These ideas should be genuine and from the heart. You're the one I love—just can't help myself! Help is given for ascertaining a partner's love language even if they do not do the quiz designed for this purpose. They may come in the form of: I couldn't have chosen a better woman/wife/mother, man/husband/father. Also, see below for a variety of ways to convey words of affirmation, how to accept affirmations and compliments gracefully (very important), and what readers of The 5 Love Languages have to say about the book. Anything less can feel like a platitude and not actually affirmative at all. The famous 5 Love Languages—Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Quality Time, Physical Touch, and Gifts—were originally laid out by Gary Chapman, a philosophy PhD, author, and talk show host. Ebonny writes to share her thoughts, observations and opinions in the hope they may be of interest, or give pause for thought, to others. It's hard for me to understand that for some people just acts of service is enough to make them feel loved.;-). "Words of Affirmation is typically the language of someone who gets off knowing that their partner is paying attention to them...and appreciates what makes them special.". You tune in to details, and people love that about you. One of the five love languages is “words of affirmation,” which is exactly what it sounds like: love and affection expressed in words, whether verbal or written. Your effort and persistence are astounding. When physically speaking to him isn't always doable, are text messages at least once a day with words of affirmation in them as powerful and meaningful as verbally speaking them? I don’t know why it took me reading a book other than the Bible to realize how real the power behind our words really is. As someone in the Words of Affirmation camp, you’re looking out for the specifics in what your partner is saying. His book, The 5 Love Languages, is a highly rated best seller, and after reading a selection of reviews from those who had read the book, I purchased an unabridged copy of the audio version to listen to with my partner. Words of Affirmation Gifts. Thanks for this study. Thanks! If this isn't your strong suit, try standing in front of a mirror and telling yourself, "I'm enough." Women's Health may earn commission from the links on this page, but we only feature products we believe in. It doesn't mean you fish for compliments. Pump him up. (ouch, re mix of UK and US spellings! People who have words of affirmation as their primary love language have a nose for B.S. If you cannot readily think of anything positively noteworthy to say about your wife, husband, or partner, you are likely taking him or her for granted. What Exactly Are The Five Love Languages? If your partner's love language is affirmation of words, then there's a good … Ebonny (author) from UK on August 05, 2013: So Words of Affirmation is certainly a primary language for you and if those around you know and practise this you must be a very happy bunny! Say all you appreciate and love about your lover.. And “thank you” often comes after something has … As well as a list of examples, there is also advice for those who cannot readily think of anything great to say about their partner! People who speak in Words of Affirmation tend to be ones who pay attention to and care about the particulars of others' lives. I guess it's why we tend to keep old "love letters" and revisit them for years to come. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you/your partner don’t express and appreciate the other languages, such as acts of service, physical touch, quality time, and receiving/giving gifts. Dr. Gary Chapman gives many many other examples, tips, and solid advice on speaking the Words of Affirmation Love Language, and of course the other four love languages. Don’t take my word for it though. "An attractive female friend told me to stop worrying about my looks because I'm hot. This content is imported from {embed-name}. Those are the ones who really feel words of affirmation. But of course we're all different and some may prefer to hear affirming words face to face, given the choice. Learning your partner’s and your own primary love language will help create a stronger bond in your relationship. Now off you go and put this into action. Words of affirmation gifts are perfect for significant others that love to … takes a moment to hype you up, acknowledge a nice gesture you did for them (or someone else), or remind you just how lucky they are to have you around. Words of Affirmation is (in my opinion) one of the most difficult of the Love Languages to learn because language is incredibly nuanced and personal. Thankfully, where words of affirmation are concerned, it is possible to fill the “love tank” in a variety of ways: Simply accept without argument, suspicion, or excessive bashfulness. Great article, the examples were perfect in helping someone very low on Words of Affirmation understand exactly what their loved one needs. The concept of the Words of Affirmation love language was introduced in Gary Chapman’s The 5 Love Languages. Say you have a big work presentation, hearing your partner remind you you're a badass before you head out will probably make you melt since their words speak to why they think you're great and what you did to make them think this. Thanks again. But expectations like that will just leave you wanting—at the end of the day, self-worth will always be an inside job. 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